Most people seek a partner for what they will bring to the couple

About 30 years ago, a few years after my divorce, I made a list of everything that I wanted from a future spouse. It took me time to realize that I was not realistic at all, that it would have taken me at least three partners to meet all my needs and basically I was very pretentious to believe that I deserved it.

I finally realized that I needed to seek a man who would enable me to know myself better, to grow spiritually and with whom I could really learn to love.

We are now in the Age of Aquarius, no longer in the time of marriages of convenience. Not so long ago, women had to find a partner or come into a community to ensure their survival. Marrying for love was very rare. Men were king and masters of their wife, children and took care of the family finances, in short, all the important decisions. Only at the beginning of the last period, the Age of Pisces, a change was felt and a great man named Jesus came to teach us unconditional love. However, as we have developed a huge ego over time, we are just beginning to put into practice his teachings of love, two thousand years later.

The Age of Aquarius gives us the opportunity to practice unconditional love and live smart. Living together helps us achieve that goal. Living smart means recognizing that we are responsible for what happens to us, that is to say that we attract everything we need. If we attract people and circumstances that we do not like, that do not meet our desires, it is unwise to persist in the same way. The solution is not to get rid of what we dislike, but rather to become aware of what is within us that attracted it.

I met several couples that broke up when they realized they had learned everything there was to learn together and it was done with respect and love. Their intimate life has ended, but they remained good friends and continue to want what is best for each other.

A couple in which each partner wants to learn about himself allows the couple to make the relationship better every year. We must learn to accept that our partner is different from us rather than have expectations and wanting to change him. That's how we learn to truly love. It is also good to keep in mind that what we dislike in our partner represents an aspect of ourselves that we do not like or want to see. Our partner is always a reflection of us. 100% of the time. But I must clarify that it is what we ARE and not what we DO that is reflected. If you want to learn and grow with your partner, pay attention to what you judge him of being.

If you think he is an extraordinary person, it is because you are too. If you think he is heartless, you think you are too. Don't let your ego convince you otherwise.

If you want a nice loving relationship, get used to the idea that times have changed and that the best way to achieve it is to be constantly on the lookout for what you can learn about yourself whether it is positive or negative. So, instead of just looking at what the other gives you or doesn't give you, start realizing that you give the same.

With love,

Lise Bourbeau